One of these photos makes me look like a candidate for the parent-of-the-year award. The other doesn’t. Pictures don’t tell the whole story.
My daughter on the violin. Don’t let this photo deceive you. I’m pretty sure she has never picked it up to start practicing without being told to, twice. I like that she plays, the benefits of learning a music instrument are many. But if she doesn’t enjoy it at some point there is a point of diminishing returns. How long would you insist she keep it up? Or would you?
My son using whatever he can find to use as his gun in his new adventure game. Don’t let this one deceive you, either. My wife and I keep him away from crappy video games and inappropriate programs and movies, but he is an American kid and he does watch television. You can’t miss guns and violence on the networks. The promos for violent dramas, the one with James Spader comes to mind, are aired early and often. So, I’d be a fool to say he’s not exposed to America’s violent gun culture. I’m not thrilled with his new found fascination with shooting things. His gun in this photo is actually a claw-hand that is typically used to grab things.
All boys go through a gun-phase at some point, right? He knows he’s not supposed to aim at people or living things, but as evident in the photo I see that direction isn’t always followed. Unless, and maybe this is the case, he was using his claw-grabber as a camera to take my photo as I was taking his. Maybe? Probably not.
When he’s out playing he’s having an absolute blast; definitely in his own world, part of me wants to let this go and chalk it up to ‘we all played a version of this game growing up’. Another part of me wants to nip it in the bud. Suggestions?
Luke Heikkila 
When it came to lessons or activities, we would always say stick it out to the end of the term, semester, season, etc and then let’s talk about it — sometimes the feeling of “I want to quit” would pass, other times not, but they still learned to follow through on the commitment they made first, rather than just quitting on a whim. And then if they wanted to quit, they had to be the one to advise the teacher/coach etc. that they decided they no longer wanted to play/participate, if it was an activity where that conversation had to take place.
And as for boys and their guns … I don’t know what to tell you …. once mine were both in high school I finally let them have some of the crappy video games and refused to let in the house before then (e.g. Call of Duty) (but absolutely drew a line with Grand Theft Auto …..) When they were younger, it was amazing how guns would turn up out of a piece of bread, legos, sticks, etc. *sigh*
Boys must be hard-wired this way, huh? Sticks, Legos…I’ve seen it all, too.
I like the idea of having my daughter advise her instructor that she’s no longer interested in violin. She’ll make it through the school year, but after that…I doubt I’ll have to nag her to practice anymore.
Thanks…Luke
We always said — we don’t care what you do as long as you do something (mind you, that was not without limits ….) but they always seemed to find something that suited them, that kept them occupied, etc. My youngest switched from Nordic skiing to robotics for winter “sport”/activity and it has been a great fit …. his decision to stop skiing and then he found something else that suited him better. Sometimes switching up the instructor can help invigorate interest in an instrument .. or sometimes music is just not their thing. The joys and challenges of parenting! Have a great weekend.